October 25th, 2008

10 Blackberry Commandments

by Jacqueline Whitmore
  1. Thou shalt not take the BlackBerry to any table with food on it or family around it. A BlackBerry is not a fruit, nor does it come from a tree.
  2. Thou shalt not use the BlackBerry as reading material in the event of insomnia. It will only worsen your situation.
  3. Thou shalt not BlackBerry in lieu of responding to a child’s request (e.g., “Wait a second, I’m reading something”).
  4. Thou shalt not place the BlackBerry within distance of hearing its incessant beeps while at home. It is not a bird.
  5. Thou shalt not check the BlackBerry as if it were your baby. It will not cry or stop breathing.
  6. Thou shalt not confuse number of e-mails with self-worth.
  7. Thou shalt do everything possible to misplace your BlackBerry on weekends. “There’s No Place Like Home” will never be the tagline for the BlackBerry company.
  8. Thou shalt remember that a BlackBerry is not a body appendage. It is a device that belongs in your briefcase or on your desk, not in social settings.
  9. Thou shalt refrain from bringing the BlackBerry to events involving family interaction. Extraneous dialogue with this contraption in lieu of real conversation suggests addiction.
  10. Thou shalt never, ever, ever bring the BlackBerry to bed. Do this and you are BlackBuried!

This was reprinted with permission by Joey Reiman, BrightHouse CEO and Founder. It was originally printed in the November 2008 issue of Pink magazine.

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